How to Talk About Careers Over Thanksgiving Without Adding Pressure

When your student comes home for Thanksgiving, you finally get a window into how they are really doing. It is a quiet pause in a busy semester, and for many caregivers, it brings a mix of pride, curiosity, and hope for what comes next. You want to check in. You want to understand where things stand. You want to be supportive without overwhelming them.

At the same time, many students arrive home more drained than they appear. In our work with college students, we often see this time of year brings fatigue, comparison, uncertainty, and quiet worries they have not yet shared at home. Even students who seem confident on the surface sometimes feel unsteady inside.

Caregivers already know their student best. Small adjustments in language simply help open the door in a way that feels supportive, calm, and respectful of the student’s experience. There is no perfect script. Just a few thoughtful shifts that encourage connection instead of pressure.

Here are some approaches that can make career conversations feel safe, meaningful, and productive over the holiday break.

Start With How They Are, Not What They Have Done

Before diving into internships, job searches, or next steps, begin with the person in front of you. Students often tell us they wish their caregivers would ask how they are feeling before asking what they have accomplished.

Try:

• “How are you feeling coming upon the end of this semester?”

• “What felt energizing or fulfilling over the past few months?”

• “What has been hard or draining lately?”

These questions invite honesty and show your student that you are interested in their experience, not just the logistics of the process.

Shift From Status Checks to Self-Reflection

Even well-intentioned progress-based questions can create pressure. Students often interpret them in ways that caregivers do not intend. Insight-driven questions help bring clarity without creating urgency.

Instead of “Do you have an internship yet?”
Try “What part of the process feels unclear or overwhelming right now?”

Instead of “Have you applied anywhere else?”
Try “What kinds of roles or environments feel like they might be a good fit for you?”

Instead of “What is your plan?”
Try “What is one next step that would help you feel more confident in moving forward?”

These questions encourage thoughtfulness and give students space to explore.

Give Them Time to Land Before Talking About Careers

Many students arrive home overstimulated and overstretched. Giving them a little breathing room before diving into career topics can make the conversation far more productive.

A simple phrase like this sets the tone:

“I know this semester has been a lot. Take a day or two to rest. When you want to talk more, I am here.”

Students almost always open up more once they feel rested and seen.

Prepare Extended Family With a Gentle, Supportive Heads Up

Caregivers often absorb the discomfort of well-meaning relatives whose questions land harder than intended. A brief, kind message can help everyone stay aligned.

Something like:

“We are keeping career conversations supportive and low pressure this year. Questions like ‘What have you been enjoying’ or ‘What are you curious about exploring’ tend to land better than checking on progress.”

This is not controlling the conversation. It is setting your student up for a holiday that feels safe and steady.

Know When to Pause the Conversation

Students communicate a lot through subtle cues. If the conversation starts to feel heavy, look for signals that it is time to pause.

Signs they may need a break:

• Short or clipped answers

• Sudden topic changes

• Shrinking body language

• Getting quiet or withdrawn

A gentle redirect helps preserve trust.

“Let’s put this on hold for now. We can come back to it later if you want.”

This is calming for both of you.

Validate Before You Guide

Students often tell us that what they want most is to feel understood before they hear advice. Validation builds safety and opens the door for constructive conversation.

Try:

• “That makes sense based on everything you are juggling.”

• “I can understand why that would feel discouraging.”

• “Thank you for telling me.”

Once they feel heard, they are far more open to solutions or ideas.

Offer Support in a Way That Lets Them Lead

Your student may want advice, or simply space to think. Offering both options helps them stay in the driver’s seat.

Try:

• “If you want to talk through options, I am here.”

• “Do you want help brainstorming, or would it feel better to just vent for a bit?”

• “Let me know what kind of support would feel helpful for you right now.”

This keeps the conversation collaborative.

Celebrate Small Wins They May Overlook

Students often minimize or miss their own progress. You can help them see it.

Examples:

• “You handled a tough semester with a lot on your plate.”

• “You built new relationships this fall.”

• “You have been showing a lot of resilience.”

• “You are learning, even when things feel uncertain.”

• “You are building your network, and that’s important too.”

These reminders reinforce self-trust and confidence, which matter more than perfect timelines.

Our Take

Thanksgiving can be a meaningful moment of connection if conversations are approached with care. Caregivers play an essential role in helping students feel safe, grounded, and capable during a season that can feel overwhelming.

At LaunchPoint Talent, we work with both students and caregivers throughout the year. We help families navigate the recruiting landscape with clarity, encouragement, and practical support. If your student could use guidance with applications, interviews, or career direction, we are here to help them move forward with confidence.